Why Islam encourages marriage, and why the ruling is not the same for everyone
Most people know Islam supports marriage, but not that the ruling differs from person to person. Part one of the married life series, on the definition, the aims, and the five cases where the ruling differs.
Most people already know that Islam supports marriage. Ask the next question, "is it required of me", and the answer stops being the same for everyone.
The religion set it up that way from the beginning. Marriage is encouraged in general, while the ruling for you depends on your own situation.
This series is knowledge, not a NikahMe service
NikahMe only helps with getting to know someone in order to consider marriage. Much of what this article and this series covers sits outside what the system does, and we do not issue religious rulings. If you have a case that needs deciding, ask a scholar who can be answerable for the answer.
What marriage is, as a matter of scholarship
Linguistically the word means joining and bringing together.
As a matter of scholarship it is a contract, established in the law, that makes it lawful for a man and a woman to find happiness in each other and to live a life together.
The word contract carries weight in that definition. Marriage begins with an undertaking that has defined pillars and conditions, and later parts of this series deal with those.
What Islam sets as the aims of marriage
The dawrah summarises three.
- Building kinship and children
- Building calm and gentleness between the two
- Protecting lineage
All three come about after two people who are each still incomplete come together. Not one of the aims sets a condition that either side must be complete or ready first.
The evidence people cite most often
يَا مَعْشَرَ الشَّبَابِ مَنِ اسْتَطَاعَ مِنْكُمُ الْبَاءَةَ فَلْيَتَزَوَّجْ، وَمَنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصَّوْمِ فَإِنَّهُ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ
No published translation is carried here for this language. Open the reference below to read one at the source.
From its first clause this text divides people into two groups, those who are able and those who are not yet, and gives each group different guidance. So the ruling was never one and the same for everybody, from the words of the Prophet onward.
The five cases where the ruling differs
The dawrah sets out five.
- Wajib (required, not to be left) for someone who is able and fears falling into zina
- Sunnah muakkadah (strongly encouraged), which is the situation most people are in
- Mubah (permitted), weighted neither toward encouragement nor prohibition
- Makruh, meaning discouraged
- Haram, meaning forbidden
The case scholars differ over is someone who is able but does not fear falling into zina.
Do not file yourself under one of these from an article
These five are a frame for understanding why the answer differs from person to person. They are not a quiz to pick from. Saying where your own case sits means looking at your actual situation, and that is the work of a scholar you can ask directly.
So why is it still hard in practice
If the religion encourages it this much, why do so many people still not know how to begin?
NikahMe surveyed 224 Thai Muslims and found the obstacle was not belief. It was the channel: getting to people, and being able to state a real intention.
82%
do not know whether the other person is ready, so they hesitate to approach
Survey of 224 Thai Muslims, 2026
78%
have no halal space to say they are ready to consider marriage without it costing them
Survey of 224 Thai Muslims, 2026
69%
find it hard to find a trusted person who understands the process
Survey of 224 Thai Muslims, 2026
People who already know the principles well still get stuck here. The full findings and numbers are in the survey article, which is published in Thai.
Next in the series
Once it is clear why marriage is encouraged, the next question is what sort of person to choose, which the texts address more directly than many people expect.
Sources and references
The definition, the aims and the five rulings are drawn from the course document for the dawrah "The Art and Science of Married Life" (فقه النكاح و العشرة) by the Munadiya academic team, taught by Ust. Khalid Silapawongsa, Ust. Fadhil Srijuree and Ust. Anas Oramlong.
- Oramlong A, Srijuree F, Silapawongsa K. Course document for the dawrah "The Art and Science of Married Life", first session [Internet]. Munadiya; 2025 [cited 16 August 2026]. Available from: https://munadiya.org/book/689194898115d416a73d4efe
- Oramlong A, Srijuree F, Silapawongsa K. Course document for the dawrah "The Art and Science of Married Life", second session [Internet]. Munadiya; 2025 [cited 16 August 2026]. Available from: https://munadiya.org/book/6a6d8094e59e1096fce046a5
- Wedlock, Marriage (Nikaah). (2) Chapter: "Whoever is able to marry, should marry...". https://sunnah.com/bukhari:5065
This article is not a religious ruling.